Top Funny Pakistani Jokes in Urdu, Roman English

A large collection of top funny Pakistani Urdu jokes.

Funny Pakistani Jokes in Urdu:

  • BV ne Radio chalaya to commentary aa rahi thee “Hog, the bowler –  a square leg, a short leg,  a long leg and a fine leg”. Cricket se na-waqif BV ne shohar se poocha: “yeh itni tangon (legs) wala kon sa bowler hai?”.
  • Aik cheeni aur aik pakistani chand per gay., cheeni ne kaha woh dekho ‘china wall’, pakistani bola: woh china wall nahin, bulke pakistan main CNG ki line lagi howee hai.
  • Mareez: “mujhe ajeeb o ghareeb bemari ho gai hai”, Dr.: “woh keya?”, Mareez: “jab bv bolti hai tu mujhe sunai nahin deta”, Dr.: “yeh bemari nahin balke Khuda ki khas rehmat hai”.
  • Aik molvi bas main safar kar raha tha, agli seat per aik aurat ka bacha ro raha tha aur woh bar bar apne bachay ko keh rehi thee khamosh ho jao, nahin to sara halwa molvi sahib ko de don gee. Jab aurat ne chothi martaba yeh kaha tu molvi sb boley: “abb jaldi faisala kar bhi lo, main tumhari wajah se 4 stop aagay aa geya hon”.
  • Udhaar/qarz sirf 80 aur 90 saal ke logon ke leye hai, aur woh bhi un k waledain (parents) ke kehne per mil sakta hai!
  • Aik aurat ki molvi sahib se takar ho gai, aurat: ” sharm nahin aati dahri rakh kar takrain marte ho”, molv sahib: “yeh dari hai, brakain nahin”
  • Teacher: “2 main se 2 nikalo, tu baqi keya bacha?”, student: “hum  ko sawal samjh nahin aya”, teacher: “tumharay pass 2 rotiyan theen, tum ne unko kha leya, abb baqi keya bacha?”, student: “salan”
  • Aik desi banda pehli bar jahaz per safar karne laga, jaise hi jahaz ne take-off keya aur agla  tyre hawa main boland howa tu woh shaks shor machanay laga ” hum pehle hi dara howa hai, aur tum one-wheeling karta hai”
  • Larka: “main pee kar nahin behakta, lakin usay dekh kar behek jata hon”, peechey se maan ki awaz ayee: “kameene sharab haram hai, aur woh haram-zadi”
  • Ustad: ” ‘main khoobsoorat hon’, yeh kon sa segha hai?”, student: “mazi”, ustad: “woh kaise?”, student: ” aapki khoobsoorti ka zamana guzar chukka hai”
  • Qehqaha (laughter) behtreen dawai hai, lakin agar koi beghair kisi wajah ke qehqaha laga raha ho tu ussy dawai ki zaroorat hai
  • Aurton (ladies) ki umar mardon se lambi kiun hoti hai??.. q k shopping karne se kisi ko heart attack nahin hota, bill ada karne se ho sakta hai
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